oohhh, aahhh

A special Valentine's dinner just calls for a special dessert. Only those who are truly loved deserve something as labor intensive and tempermental as Chocolate Souffle. Oh, but when it's served piping hot, all smooth and fluffy with a scoop of vanilla bean ice cream... it just melts your heart.

girls getaway

one man with about 16 girls? grandpa stander is a lucky guy!

dave's aunt jeanette was kind enough to invite all the girls in the family down to st. george for a weekend o' fun. we shopped, talked, got massages, relaxed, ate, and most importantly did lots of crafts!!
judy surprised megan and i with matching valentine's pajamas- oh, so comfy!
thomas, ashley, marianne, joan, judy

grandma stander collected thousands of buttons, so we decided to put them to use. you can't be upset in heaven, right?
just a glimpse of our many crafts- think bracelets, headbands, blankets, cake stands and more. you would think our last name was etsy.

can i get a woo-woo?

After going to Chicago to attend the American Burn Association conference in April 2008, I became greatly interested in some research possibilities. It sounded fun at the time, but after many hours spent in the basement of University Hospital going through medical records, I realized research isn't for sissys.

In conjunction with 2 other nurses, a research nurse, and our supportive physicians, we finished our paper. Not only did we finish, but it was presented at the 2009 ABA conference, and now it is published!

You can check it out here-- it may not be the cause of riveting discussion at your next book club, but I'm excited about it. And you thought I was just a nurse...

our winter stay-cation

We need not travel far to have a good time! We spent a day at the Homestead in Midway and had a blast. We started off with some tubing, lazy style- where the rope tow drags you up the hill. But the rides up were half the fun~

The mineral water natural crater served as our warm water destination. Oh how I love swimming when the water is warm!
These ice sculptures were quite the sight- the pictures don't do them justice. It made me want to be an ice princess and live in a castle like that.
I wish we could make a tradition of this and do it every year! I wanted to stay longer and go snowshoeing, x-country skiing, relax with a good book, and sleep in for a few more days. What a great way to start Dave's birthday celebrations.

blue christmas

Another pregnancy come and gone, and still no desired result. The news Dave and I received on Christmas Eve: "You're not pregnant after all. But you may have an ectopic pregnancy. We don't know. You can't go on your cruise. You need to take a chemo drug to kill all the cells. You can't try to get pregnant again for several months. Merry Christmas."

I feel like I'm in a bad dream. Not only are our hopes of this next pregnancy crushed, but now we have to stay home and have salt poured in our wounds every day. Our Christmas was spent in tears. And now Dave's birthday will not be spent slow dancing on top of a cruise ship in 80 degree weather like we had planned- instead we will be home in the cold.

Winter is my least favorite of the seasons; the cold and the dark take a toll on my mood and emotions. But usually Christmas is the warm highlight of the winter. Not this year. Christmas is supposed to be a time when your heart feels full, with so much joy and love. Yet mine feels shattered and broken. How can others have a "Merry Christmas" when I feel so miserable? How can the rest of the world open gifts with smiles and cheer when I can barely pull myself together? Why are Dave and I the "downers" of our friends and families, with people feeling awkward and uneasy around us? What has happened to the Holly I used to know?

My list of unanswered questions goes on and on. What am I to do in the coming year to change the current course my life is taking? 2009 has felt like the evil step-sister of the previous years of my life. I can only hope and pray that 2010 is more graceful, kind, sweet, and gentle.

cookie jar

The woman who started it all and has shared her skills with the rest of us. As this year's official "cookie counter," Mom was in charge of making sure each of us got our equal share (which ended up around 12 dozen per person!)

Dress code for the day: aprons

My two personal favorites: chocolate parfait (above) and orange carrot (below). They're melting in my mouth already.

COOKIE BAKE 2009

1 of my 15 minutes of fame

Check this out!